Tuesday, August 17, 2010

I have no friends

Well, I have some friends. 

We moved from our hometown of St Louis, five years ago to a small town in Southern Maryland about 60 miles south of DC. Things were a little slow on the friends front, but once we had our first baby, I was able to connect with other new moms through community groups and the library. It was part commuter town, part military town, as it was close to the Pax River NAS where my husband was a contractor and I could go to the park any day of the week and come home with three new best friends. 

Fast forward four years. Due to a BRAC closing of the ANG Base in St Louis, a full time Guard slot opened and we had the opportunity to move our growing family about three hours from our home town. 

Perfect. 

Well, almost perfect.

I consider myself to be a pretty outgoing gal, but I can not meet cool chicks to save my freakin life! My neighborhood is full of (awesome) looong term residents (read: old), so we don't have the kind of neighbors you can split a bottle of wine with on a Saturday night. I was hoping to connect with some mom's of the kids in my son's preschool class, but when they drop their kids off, they have stuff to do and were not interested in a meet up at Starbucks. So many people are locals, and they grew up here, and have friends and family in town, so they don't even consider adding new people in their lives. 

I know it will get better and most days I am cool just hanging with my monsters, but sometimes it's just nice to know you have a friend a phone call away. 

10 comments:

Krista said...

what about a MOPS group? Or a church? bible study? go online and find a playgroup. Show up at the Y, health club, starbucks, kid in tow and be strong, be bold, make the first move!

Muliebrity said...

Believe it or not, there is no MOPS group 'round these parts! I do belong to a church, but since they have a K-12 school attached to the church, they don't have much going on for very young families. I am in contact with a local book store and am trying to organize a book club or something, but the owner already warned me that many of the mom's "my age" are working during the day and it's usually older women interested in the book clubs.

I am on a mission to find some additional activities this fall.

S.I.F. said...

Ummmm, HELLO! What about your *fake internet friends*?!? ;)

I actually know what you're talking about lady. When I first moved up here, it was a bunch of clicks that were formed back when most of these women were in diapers. I was NOT a fan. My first good friend that I made on my own (outside the group of friends that my best friend had grown up with here) had actually just moved here, and that's totally what we clicked over!

If I were there, I would come over and share a glass of wine with you for sure lady. Well... I'm not drinking, so I would kind of just stare at the glass of wine and try not to cave, but... you know what I mean!

Rebecca said...

Where are you again? Near me? St Peters?

Jeanette said...

I know exactly how you feel! At 18 I moved to a new area and made friends easily. I worked and had no children so it was a piece of cake to go out and meet people. Then I moved again. I'm a little over an hour from my hometown but with 2 young children it's too hard to get down there often enough to rekindle my old friendships. Where I live now, there aren't any MOPS or playgroup things... so all of my adult interaction has centered around the computer. A couple months ago I got some new neighbors and they have children the same ages as mine, so I've gotten kind of friendly with them, but other than that, my friends all live in the computer!

Too bad we don't live closer together. Due to our mutual love of sarcasm I think we would get along great!

Shawnee said...

Hey girl, at least you are trying! I am stuck in the comfort bubble of home and online friends.

Elisa V said...

I have an idea!

Move back to Southern Maryland and WE will hang out!

Momof3inVA said...

That's cause all the cool chicks are over here eating at Horne's...LOL.

...and I am with SIF, what about all of us cool "internet" chick? :P

Joanna @ The Casa said...

yeah, the cool internet chics are not pleased. ;0)

I know how you feel... I think everyone has a bunch of friends already and they just don't have room for me.

Since I'm 37 with 2 year olds most of the mom's my age are much younger.

It's a no win situation.

Move to Forth Worth, we'll hang out and most certainly split a bottle of wine (or two).

Dawn said...

I definitely understand the feelings you describe in this post. I moved from GA to OR in 2006. Here we are 4 years later and I still don't have any really good friends.

Luckily for me, my middle daughter and her 2 kids moved out here last year. So now, I have someone to hang out with that I really, really like...and Taylor has respite care with someone I never have to worry about.

Good luck on finding IRL friends but don't forget your *fake internet friends*.